And this here's the TV. 2 hours a day, either educational or football, so you don't ruin your appreciation of the finer things.

Keeping with acrostics, I spend time in pre-marital counseling talking about S.M.I.R.K., 5 areas of potential conflict in marriage. I encourage couples to think and talk through these issues ahead of time, preferably prior to engagement ... but who am I kidding?

S … Sexuality

• To what extent have you shared your sexual past?
• What boundaries have you set prior to marriage?
• How important is the sexual side of a marriage relationship?
• How important is it to your potential spouse?
• How have past experiences impacted your views regarding sexuality?
• How does Bible address these issues so that your views might differ from the culture's?
  

M … Money

• Who will write out the checks, etc. to pay the bills?
• Who will balance the check book?
• Have you constructed a budget?
• How will big decisions be determined? Small decisions?
  
• Will you both work? Either way, how will household tasks be performed?
• Have you written a will?
• What are your thoughts and goals regarding debt, savings, and retirement?
• How does Bible address these issues so that your views might differ from the culture's?

I … In-Laws

• What boundaries have you established where family is concerned?
• What are the in-laws’ expectations of their new son/daughter-in-law?
• Have you discussed how you will handle family holidays?
• If there is divorce in your families, what have you learned from such exposure/experience? What are the grounds for divorce for you?
• How does Bible address these issues so that your views might differ from the culture's?

R … Religion

• How are your religious journeys/backgrounds different?
• What spiritual/church issues have you already discussed?
• Any compromises reached?
• What is your plan for developing the family’s spiritual growth?
• What is your anticipated participation in your church (e.g., attendance, finances, responsibilities, etc.)?
• How does Bible address these issues so that your views might differ from the culture's?

K … Kids

• If both parents work, who will look after the children?
• To what extent have you discussed your plans regarding children (e.g., how many, contraception, discipline, attire, religious instruction, schooling, etc.)?
• In the event of your deaths, who would raise your children?
• How do your children feel about the marriage? How have you discussed the upcoming changes?
• How does Bible address these issues so that your views might differ from the culture's?

General Questions:

• Why do you think you should get married?
• What counsel did you receive to encourage you to marriage?
• How do your families feel about you getting married?
  
• Are you in love? How do you know?
• What do you enjoy doing together?
• If one spouse is not going to be a stay-at-home parent, how will you allocate household chores?
• How do you demonstrate love to your potential spouse? How does your spouse prefer to be loved?
  
• What are your plans for conflict resolution?