Monday, July 09, 2007

Gentlemen, I wouldn't trust this overgrown pile of microchips any further than I can throw it.

Sometimes I think my computer is possessed and is out to get me. Maybe it is.

Regardless, I don't trust it.

The following are some quotes about computers, some funnier than others.

  1. Passwords are like underwear. You shouldn’t leave them out where people can see them. You should change them regularly. And you shouldn’t loan them out to strangers.
  2. You have just received the Amish Computer Virus. Since the Amish don't have computers, it is based on the honor system. So please delete all the files from your computer. Thank you for your cooperation.
  3. Use The Best ... Linux for Servers, Mac for Graphics, Palm for Mobility, and Windows for Solitaire.
  4. Microsoft: "You’ve got questions. We’ve got dancing paperclips."
  5. Girls are like internet domain names, the ones I like are already taken.
  6. Windows has detected you do not have a keyboard. Press 'F9' to continue.
  7. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny
  8. That's a PEBKAC problem. (Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair)
  9. Windows XP - Now comes with free anger management courses!
  10. Who is "General Failure" and why is he reading my disk?
  11. There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
  12. Who needs friends? My PC is user friendly.
  13. There is only one satisfying way to boot a computer.
  14. A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
  15. Alert! User Error. Please replace user and press any key to continue.
  16. It has been stated that a million monkeys using a million keyboards could reproduce the complete works of William Shakespeare. With the advent of MySpace, we know that to be false.


At 09 July, 2007 09:20, Blogger M. Jay Bennett said...

Hysterical! Thanks for the laugh Gun!

My favorite?


At 09 July, 2007 12:36, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Those are funny. I dig the binary one, my co-worker with a binary wall clock will like. Reminds me of when I was working on customers sites upgrading main frame systems. We had some logs that reported error locations as "P-side" or "C-side" this was in relation to peripheral or core side (similiar to medical term of distal & proxal). So when the customer would point out an error on our system that was just operator error, I would say it was "P-side of the MMI" of course the Man to Machine Interface (MMI)was the keyboard, so the only thing p-side of that was the human/monkey :)

At 09 July, 2007 13:02, Blogger GUNNY said...

I actually had to read the binary one a second time. For me, the switch was not on the first time.


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