Charging a man with murder in this place was like handing out speeding tickets at the Indy 500.
I found this funny, and rather educational. It's from a page I happened upon explaining How to Avoid a Traffic Ticket.*
4. Don't stand out in a crowd. Let other vehicles and drivers attract an officer's scrutiny while you drive nearly invisibly.
- Maintain your vehicle. Cracked windshields, burnt-out taillights, and a whole host of other minor maintenance issues can get you a ticket.
- Wear your seatbelt. It's the law pretty much everywhere, and an iron clad excuse for a sharp-eyed officer to pull you over.
- Look attentive. Being the one in the pack with a cell phone cradled on your neck and a burger in the other hand is not a good thing.
- If you are choosing, choose a plain-colored sedan with economy styling over a sporty-looking coupe with bright, eye-popping colors and/or customized appearance. There are lots of economical-looking little cars with snappy power-to-weight ratios and safe, excellent handling.
- Don't cover your car in eye-catching stickers and/or controversial slogans, no matter how mad some politician makes you. A cop may be a big fan of the guy you loathe most.
- Remove license plate frames and dealer stickers that identify you as being from 'out of town' wherever else you go in your state. People who travel a long way are less likely to show up in court to dispute a ticket.
- Don't drive a rolling pig sty. All windows should offer unobstructed views to the driver.
I might add the following:
- Don't kick the bass so hard that your windows visibly rattle.
- Don't drive faster than everyone else, who may have seen the officer, or so slow that you draw suspicion.
- Don't darken your windows so much as to suggest suspicious activity occurs within.
- Don't fly your away team's car flag when leaving the stadium, especially if the home team lost.
- Minimize the amount of duct tape visible to the naked eye.
- Ensure nothing on your vehicle is being held on with bungee cords.
- Don't lean your seat back so much that the only part of you visible is your hand resting on the top of the steering wheel.